What Self Compassion Really Looks Like
We’re often our own harshest critics. While we offer kindness to others without hesitation, we can struggle to extend the same grace inward. That’s where self-compassion comes in—not as a buzzword, but as a powerful, transformative practice.
What Is Self-Compassion?
Self-compassion means treating yourself with the same kindness, care, and understanding that you'd offer a friend. It doesn’t mean letting yourself off the hook or avoiding responsibility—it means showing up for yourself with gentleness, especially when things feel hard.
Psychologist Dr. Kristin Neff outlines three core components of self-compassion:
Self-kindness – Being warm and understanding toward yourself when you suffer, fail, or feel inadequate.
Common humanity – Recognizing that imperfection is part of being human—you’re not alone.
Mindfulness – Noticing your thoughts and feelings without judgment or over-identifying with them.
What It Doesn’t Look Like
Pretending everything is okay
Ignoring difficult emotions
Being passive or unmotivated
Making excuses
Self-compassion isn’t about lowering the bar—it’s about changing how you speak to yourself while still moving forward.
Practicing Self-Compassion in Daily Life
When you notice self-criticism, pause and ask: Would I say this to someone I care about?
When you’re struggling, try placing a hand on your heart and saying: This is hard—and I’m allowed to be kind to myself right now.
Journal your feelings without editing or fixing them—just give them space.
Celebrate small wins and progress, not just end results.
Why It Matters
Self-compassion can lower anxiety, reduce burnout, and increase emotional resilience. It helps you stay grounded through challenges—and builds a deeper, kinder relationship with yourself.
You don’t have to earn compassion. You are worthy of it, exactly as you are.
Want support cultivating self-compassion?
In therapy, we can explore the inner critic, practice new ways of relating to yourself, and create room for softness in your healing.
Reach out to start your journey.